When walking through the streets, he once called out "I AM GOD; WHY DO YOU NOT WORSHIP ME?" He spent his time sitting with his head resting between his knees, one of his companions stating he did so for thirty years. But strangest of all was his obedience to a dog he once came across. The dog had apparently become upset at Bayazid's attempt to avoid him, to which the dog spoke to him and scolded him. So Bayazid pleaded "O dog, you are so enlightened, live with me for some time."

Or how about this quote attributed to Junaid in the same book:

"I saw a thief who was being gibbeted. I bowed to him... for being true to the profession he followed."

Want to be a Sufi Master? Well, if you declare yourself to be Allah, start hearing voices emananating out of dogs, and start praying to thieves and criminals, you are well on your way. Allahu Akbar. Tadhkarat ul-Awliya (memoires of the saints) is an established sufi text that has even been quoted to me by people on this list in a bid to justify some of outrageous claims made as to their shuyukh. Aside from being riddled with textbook examples of kufr and shirk, the book reads like "Tales of the Arabian Nights" with wonderful stories of sufis flying through the air, etc. etc. No doubt all done with the aid of sihr, but thats another issue..